flamingtampons: there is a duck inside every woman waiting to burst forth when a camera draws close
sexybritishllama: no cough syrup you are not ‘grape flavoured’ have you ever tasted a grape you taste like death and the tears of small children not fucking grape
What can be explained is not poetry.– W.B. Yeats (via bodasdesangre)
sometimes i forget i have boobs
sekoshi: vegetarianlyfe: pineapplebananacurry: and then i look down and it’s like oh hello when did you two get there what do you want I’m like this except with my dick. And sometimes I’m just like holy shit did I get fatter why are my pants so tight. Then I realize I have a boner. Sometimes I forget I have a butt Then I feel hands on it Whether they’re mine or someone else’s ...
Imagine the names of the future generations.
Mother: Hi, Harry. Did you invite your friends over?
Son: Yes mom, this is Peeta, Blaine, Percy, Katniss, Sherlock and Thedoctor.
Mother: You should have asked that nice Nepeta girl over.